“Excuse me”, I said in a really low voice, only to be ignored by my waitress. My attempts to get her attention by raising my right hand was unsuccessful as well. Then it occurred to me, “It’s easy for me to go unnoticed and unheard”. Granted, at times this is done intentionally but this time was different, I really wanted a refill on my unsweetened Iced Tea. Although my waitress was not rude (she was actually very cool) only the bass in my husbands voice was able to get her attention. I’m sure all women don’t experience being ignored due to lacking bass in their voice, so I’m forced to ask myself, “Why me”?

Is it the way that I carry myself that makes people ignore and although I’m sure that they don’t do on purpose, do they think they hear something but are not sure who that soft voice is coming from so they say nothing?

I’ve always been the type of person who did not want to bring any attention to myself for fear of it being negative attention. *Newsflash*, there are ways to bring positive attention to yourself and say what you want in a non confrontational manner, while ensuring that you are heard. To get what you want out of life or in any given situation you must speak up. If you want another Iced Tea, instead of saying, “excuse me”, try remembering the waitresses name and as he or she walks past say, “Susan, May I have a refill”? Saying her name will definitely get her attention.

More importantly, when dealing with people, just say what you want and don’t beat around the bush. You’re a grown up now, so you really can’t get into trouble for speaking your mind. So if you want your husband to be more intimate with you, tell him. Most people don’t catch onto hints, especially men. Assuming that people are psychics isn’t fair to you nor is it fair to them. As for that position at work you’ve been eyeing for a while……..Make your interest known. Do not assume that everyone knows that your interested in the new opening at your company just because your asking random questions. Find out who is in charge, schedule a meeting and make it known that you wish to be considered for the position.

The worst thing that anyone can tell you is “no” but at least you spoke up for yourself.